Flashback Friday

April 2010.

This flashback isn't from that long ago, but to me it seems like a lifetime ago.

We were at the hospital with Autumn. She had been there for just under 24 hours and they wanted her to talk with a phychologis/phychiatrist (I'm not sure which one). She was only 4 1/2 years old. I wasn't sure how it was going to go but they didn't give me a choice.

This lovely young women came in, introduced herself and asked to speak with Autumn. I was allowed to stay in the room but it was obvious that it was preferred that the conversation between them wasn't to include me.

The doctor pulled out a doll. We later learned that they are called trama dolls. It was a muslin doll. No face, no clothes. Just a doll. The doctor told Autumn to give her a name. She named her Amanda. She than asked her to draw a face on Amanda with some markers she had. Next she had her select a hospital gown for her new friend to wear.

Than they had a nice little chat through Amanda. Amanda also was just diagnosed with Diabetes and my precious little girl fell in love with her and was excited to take care of her.

Their talk went well. I was amazed how smoothly it went, how much Autumn shared and what a cool idea that doll was.

We left the hospital 2 days later. Amanda was safely tucked in Autumns arms for her car ride to her new home. And not only did we have plenty of supplies for Autumn, we also had a stash of supplies for Amanda.

Amanda was Autumn's best friend in those early days of diagnosis. She didn't go anywhere without her. She took good care of her and loved her with all her heart.

As the days passed Amanda seemed to be needed less and less. I knew exactly when Autumn felt safe and in a routine with her new way of life. I knew because she no longer needed Amanda like she did in the beginning.

3 years later, Amanda is still on her bed but she is rarely played with. We will keep her forever because she was the one thing who got Autumn through the hardest time in her life. I will always be thankful to that doll for what she did for my daughter.

And in the past 3 years my mom, along with Autumn's help, has made well over 100 trama dolls and hospital gowns to donate to Children's Hospital. Our hope is that those dolls helped other kids as much as they helped mine.